Little Miss went to bed at 6:20 last night, so I found myself with some unplanned time on my hands. Instead of spending that time wisely, or reading one of the many books I have checked out from the library, I got sucked into the media coverage on the Virginia Tech shootings.
It breaks my heart to learn about the victims, all of whom had so much going for them. It makes me wonder what this world is coming to. I think back on my days in college, and they were carefree and happy days. There wasn’t concern over security on campus and I felt safe there. The Virginia Tech students have been robbed of that security. I can only imagine the emotional trauma of the survivors, and the anguish of the family members.
Being a mother, I think these types of incidents bother me more now than they used to. It makes me wonder in what kind of world my daughter will grow up. I worry about terrorism, drugs, and global warming, to list a few. All of these things weren’t of concern to me as I was growing up, and it pains me to realize that she will have to deal with the threats of these much too young. It scares me to have her leave the safe cocoon that we have created for her, but I know that must happen. It brought tears to my eyes to see the parents talking about their lost children.
I told JB the other night that my worst fear would be to lose either him or Little Miss. I asked him if he ever had those thoughts, and he said no, why would you die? I wish I could live in that state of bliss, but I have seriously become a worry wart.
I have been thinking recently how everything is going well for us. I have finally realized my biggest life dreams, including finding the love of my life and having a child. I look at our life, and how unbelievably lucky we are, and I start to worry that something will happen to take that away from us.
Seeing the images on TV regarding Virginia Tech remind me that it could happen in a split second. I thank God every day for our blessings, and make a conscious effort to tell the people in my life how much I love them, but I can’t keep the fears from my mind.
God bless everyone affected by this tragedy. You are in my thoughts and prayers.