Push It

I was sitting innocently at my desk this afternoon, when Salt-N-Peppa’s Push It came on my Internet Radio. OK, the secret is out, I was listening to Absolute 80s.

I have a special affinity to this song. The first boy I ever kissed taught me the chorus…

Ohhhh, baby baby
Push it good
Push it real good

I was twelve, and was going on my first trip sans-parents to an out of town swim meet. We were in a van, and I sat in the seat in front of him… Brandon Godfrey. On our way to the meet, he for some reason felt the need to teach me the lyrics to Push It. I was a church going square who had never heard of that song.

The first night we arrived at our destination (some small town in New Mexico), I gathered with fellow swimmers in my age group in one hotel room. For some reason, we were unsupervised, and began to play a game of Truth or Dare.

I was dared to spend two minutes in the bathroom with Brandon. This is similar to ’2 minutes in the closet’ that most kids do, but we didn’t have a closet in our hotel room.

We walked in, and he turned off the lights, and he kissed me. I was so grossed out. I felt accosted by his tongue, and remember he drooled a lot. I was so relieved when the rest of the kids yelled that our 2 minutes were up.

The worst part about it, though, was when we emerged from the bathroom, no one believed that I actually kissed him. That really pissed my twelve year old self off. I mean, I was making an honest effort to not be completely square, and no one acknowledged it. That was quite a sacrifice in the name of being accepted.

I didn’t think he was cute, and really wasn’t attracted to him… Ever… I mean, even after swimming with him for another four years after *the kiss*, I never thought much of him. But he goes down in that special part of my personal history as the first boy I ever kissed.

All of that because I was listening to Awesome 80s today. Talk about a time warp.